Bilarous
Bilaruos-Normal.png|Bilarous' normal form. Bilaruos-endranic.png|Bilarous' Endranic form. Bilarous- Baconic.png|Bilarous' Baconic form. Bilarous-magmonic.png|Bilarous' Magmonic form. Bilarous-Final.png|Bilarous' Final form. NOTE: THE FOLLOWING PAGE IS A PILE OF CRINGEY STUFF I MADE WHEN I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND HOW TO WRITE WELL. PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK. Also, I'm currently revamping this page to make it infinitely less shitty. If you want to see the old version (but why tho), you can just check the page's history. Some spelling errors on this page have been reverted, as sometimes, these "errors" are completely intentional. Bilarous '''is both the first boss you encounter in minecraft and the being that terrorizes Black Void. Lore + History Bilarous was a Galax created by Mu Cephi. He was very powerful, but only the third-weakest member of The Eight Harbingers. His source of power is his "nerdiness", which quantifies how much of a "nerd" he is. He posed as a Galax scientist and rose up into the ranks to gain access to lethal potential to conquer the Multiverse. He was banished to the Black Void for conducting deadly experiments involving the creation of Voidsky Slimes. There, he caught a disease that made him transform into other creatures randomly to which the Galax had no immunity at the time. However, as Bilarous wasn't just an ordinary Galax, he happened to not only be immune to the virus, but it ended up benefiting him, and could control the disease's transformations, allowing for a wide variety of forms that he can switch between, but is still considered a demon by others due to said shapeshifting power. Curiously, there was no evidence of his Galax origins afterwards. It is unknown to many if this is the same Bilarous, but the resemblances are spot on. Most think that Bilarous is a mere myth made to scare children into obedience. Tactics (First battle) When the player loads up a new world, the following cutscene will play. ???: What's up, stupid? Player: Wait, who said that!? Also, I'll have you know that whatever kind of idea you have about myself is ENTIRELY subjective. ???: I'd tell you, but you'd have to git gud first, and you look like a total scrub to me! (*"???" comes out of nowhere*) ???: Anyway, you better get ready to die! (*the first battle begins*) You can't use the crafting grid or get the "Taking inventory" achievement at this time. "???" has 10 health (5 hearts) and deals 0.5 damage (A quarter of a heart) to you with every touch. Cheerful music plays when you fight "???". He's pretty easy, and can be put down with mere punches. The next scene will play when "???" has 1 heart left. ???: You might be tougher and smarter than you look. But I'm a nerd, so that automatically means I'm better than you in every single way! Just a note, I was merely testing the waters with you. You're NOT going to like it when I decide not to go easy. (*"???" vanishes, leaving behind a crafting grid and the achievements menu, as well as enough EXP to reach Level 1.*) (*Cutscene end*) Now the player will have access to the crafting grid, and achievements/advencements/whatever they call them these days. Tactics (2nd battle) In order to fight "???" a second time, you have to have beaten Geterakes. Then, you must kill 70 galactic skeletons, then go to Black Void. When you do this, the following cutscene plays. (*"???" Appears out of nowhere*) Player: Well, YOU look familiar. ???: I think you'd remember the first guy you'd seen in this realm. Player: Now that I think about it, you said something about holding back. Since I happen to have MUCH higher-level gear now, I have a feeling you won't even be a challenge at your "full power". ???: ROFL, ignorance much? Just so you know, appearances don't define a person; 'tis what's on the inside that matters, punk! You know, like my nerdy brain of doom! And BTW.... Bilarous: The name's Bilarous, and like I said to you before, I'm a total nerd! Player: No wonder you couldn't do much to me. Not only are you small, but you HONESTLY think you're A-Tier material just because you happened to be challenging at the time. Face it 'pal', you stopped being relevant the moment you dropped that grid thingy. Bilarous: Oh ho ho, but you'd have to be even more idiotic than that Corrupt Zombie I oneshotted on the way back here to think I don't have something up my nonexistent nerdy labcoat sleeves! Player: REALLY? While it's true that strats ARE an important factor of any battle, it doesn't automatically make you capable of taking two hits from an even a dull Emerald Sword. Bilarous: Not so easy, lemon squeezy! '''HUZZAH!!! (*The player's inventory and armor are taken away from them after being zapped by Bilarous*) Player: ...You did NOT just do that. Bilarous: OH, but I DID! Player: Whoa, this is ridiculous! Can't we settle this like people who are at least SOMEWHAT CIVILIZED, instead of butchering each other? Bilarous: Sure, got any ideas? Player: How about a game of Laser Chess? Bilarous: Sounds like a plan. Let's do it. (*A "1 hour later" transition happens*) Bilarous: Ugh, this is boring! I don't caer if this is gentlemanly, it's making me fall asleep! Er, verbal typos aside, I have a better idea in mind...! We'll settle this in the arena! Player: I don't like the sound of that. (*Bilarous Coughs and the room turns into a collossal arena made of Bedrock*) Bilarous: I'll eat your blood and drink your brains! ...er, I mean uh, the exact same thing but backwards! Player: ..."Sniarb ruoy knird dna doolb ruoy tae ll'I"? Bilarous: No. Stop trying to sound more nerdy than me this instant. (*The first phase begins*) You have no inventory to use when fighting Bilarous' first form. Bilarous has the same attack as usual, but it does 12 damage. The same cheery music from last time is retained. Bilarous has 700 health in his first form. However, the player most likely is a high enough level to fight him, even with just their bare fists. When you get him down to 300 health, the following cutscene plays. (*Bilarous takes a critical punch from the player*) Bilarous: If.. you think that y... ou're better than me, tha-an- *Starts coughing* (*Suddenly, the player gets what was in his or her inventory and his or her armor back) Bilarous: ...Oh. well, since that's how the situation's playing out, I think I'll just make a temporary- SIKE,THAT'STHEWRONGNUMBAH! (*Bilarous shoots lighting at the player, giving them weakness 4 and blindness 1*) Bilarous: I'm not done yet, either! SKIZAM! (*Bilarous calls down a lighting strike onto himself, giving himself strength 4 and speed 2 for the rest of the fight*) Bilarous: You feel like dying NOW? Player: I wouldn't dream of it. (*The second phase begins*) Now, the player will get a blindness 1 and weakness 4 effect as long as the second phase lasts, same as Bilarous' speed 2 and strength 4 effect. Also, Bilarous will gain an attack where he shoots acid at you, which gives you Poison 3 and Wither 0.5 both for 15 seconds. The next cutscene will play when you get Bilarous down to 0 health. (*Heartbeat loop plays*) Bilarous: Ugh... I'l.... remember this......... PUNK. '("Punk" Echoing) (*Heartbeat loop ends and Bilarous seemingly dies, keeling over to the side*) Player: Ugh, FINALLY. (*Bilarous gets up and purple and blue sparks start surrounding him*) Bilarous: SIKE 2X COMBO! You don't have room to celebrate just yet, PUNK! Player: I literally JUST saw you die. You're probably just some illusion made to annoy me to death or whatev- (*Billarous jumps at the player full force, and hurts them*) Billaros: Can an illusion do THAT, punk? I'm pretty sure they can't. Now that we've cleared that mess up, I'll destroy you and that'll be the end of it! '''NERD POWER!!!!1!!1!!one!! '(Echoing) (Bilarous starts transforming into a four armed enderman and after 7 seconds the transformation is complete) Bilarous: SEE? I'm so nerdy that I can switch forms! I just happen to like the first form the most is all! But enough talk, punk. Have at you!! (*The third phase begins*) Bilarous, in his Endraic form, can Teleport short distances, and "Staring" at him for 2 seconds will give you Wither 2. In this form, Bilarous has 17000 health. The Cheerful music turns into a dark, way less cheery melody that just screams "You aren't going to make it alive, punk. You're going to die a horrible death here.". Bilarous Can fire two Homing purple shots which give you Wither 1. Phase 4 will begin when you get his second form down to 6000 health. (*Bilarous clones himself six times*) Bilarous: Which one is the real me, PUNK? Player: You DO know I can just attack ALL of you, right? Bilarous: Well, yeah, but the clones will just counterattack. Might want to think before letting loose, punk! (*The fourth phase begins*) Bilarous' clones, upon being struck, shoot out a an unavoidable lavender shockwave that deals 13 damage and gives a stacking Weakness effect that gets stronger (in terms of both level and the time it takes for it to wear off) the more times you strike a clone, and the real Bilarous will tell you that "You're wrong!". Each Clone has the same exact health Bilarous is at in case of mods that display enemy health, but in reality have infinite health. When you hit the real Bilarous, the following cutscene will play. Bilarous: Tch, correct answer. Now let's see how you do against THIS, PUNK! (*A bolt of lightning strikes, and 20 Corrupted Ghasts appear out of nowhere*) Bilarous: Have fun, boys. (*Bilarous disappears, and the fifth phase begins*) Now, you have to fight TWENTY Corrupted Ghasts at the same time. This could be a problem. The same cutscenes in the Corrupted Ghast battle never happen whatsoever here, and they don't have their instakill attack. The next cutscene begins when you kill every Corrupted Ghast. (*The final Corrupted Ghast dies showing whatever you killed it with*) (*Bilarous appears behind the player*) Bilarous: Nice! Though, you recently freed most of my summon slots by doing that Corrupted Ghasts take 3 whole slots, y'know? Player: You know, I feel like doing an impression of you. (mocking tone) "I'm a big fat know-it-all, I'm going hide behind my minions even though I could take this guy on personally, and despite the fact that most of my attacks are somewhat tricky to dodge!". Bilarous: I hope you feel proud of what you just said. Player: Well DUH, otherwise I wouldn't have said it. Your minions to me were like Zombies to a Diamond Golem. Bilarous: Fine. But just a fair warning, Ghasts aren't the ONLY things I can summon. (*Bilarous disappears, and summons 30 Corrupt Skeletons with Galactic Superbows, and 20 Corrupt Zombie Pigmen with Emerald swords enchanted with Sharpness 7 and Fire aspect 5*) Player: ...You just HAD to pick THIS combination, didn't you. (*The sixth phase begins*) You must take down all the enemies that Billarous summoned in order to continue with the fight. The next cutscene will play when you kill all the summoned foes. (*The player tries to catch his breath, but 16 Craggy Trollgons appear out of nowhere*) Player: Okay, now this is just bottom of the barrel. The ONLY reason these things are even threatening anymore is because they take what feels like a decade to kill! Now, you have to kill 16 Craggy Trollgons, enormous health pool and everything. However, they will have Armorless 2 as a result of Bilarous summoning them too quickly after the last wave. That doesn't mean they'll go down without a fight, though! The next scene will play when all of the summoned Trollgons are dead. (Side note: after the fight, the player will instantly gain 8 full levels, and the game will fully heal them.) Bilarous: Well, I guess that's what happens when you try to bum rush someone with summons way too quickly; they end up getting weaker than usual. Can't say I'm not impressed, though! As a reward, I think I'll let you start hitting me again! (*the eighth phase begins*) Bilarous does the same things as in the third phase. Except this time, they deal 10 more damage. The next cutscene begins when you kill Bilarous' Endraic form. (Bilarous screams in pain as he turns into purple ashes* (*The player walks up to the ashes, and and eye forms from the ashes, forming into the player's skin but purple, and has dark blue irises and cyan eyes*) Bilarous: SURPRISE! Now, I'm you, BUT NERDIER! Player: You know, you REALLY need to stop trying to fake me out. The surprise factor wears out after a while. Besides, just because you're an obsidian-skinned version of me doesn't make you any better than me. (*cutscene end*) Bilarous has the same inventory as the player, and the same armor. Billarous can do the same things the player can, but Billarous has 700 more health. The next cutscene occurs when you get Bilarous down to 300 health. Bilarous: Wow, you actually seem to be holding up pretty well! Though, I should warn you that my Copy form doesn't just let me do the same things you can; it also lets me do OTHER STUFF! (*the tenth phase begins*) Bilarous can bow shoot the same homing shots as in phase 3 and he can summon Corrupted Skeletons, Corrupted Spiders, and Corrupted Magma Cubes. Oh yeah, and he can teleport. The next phase begins when you kill Bilarous in his copy form. ''-NOTE: This is as far as I'm at with the revamp. The rest is just cringe.-'' Bilarous: Oh, good. Now I get to test out my baconic form. Player: What the heck is a Baconic? Bilarous: It's basically your worst nightmare. *Bilarous starts turning into a zombie pigman* Bilarous: At least I won't see your blood on most of my blade, Punk. *The eleventh phase begins* Bilarous will give you the Wither effect when he touches you, as well as dealing 18 damage when you touch him. He can also summon Zombie pigmen mounted on Horses or Yvescas. Bilarous has 13000 health in this form. The next phase begins when his fourth form is down to 7000 health. Bilarous: Let's see you handle this! Let's go into MY teritory. Player: But Isn't THIS you territory? Bilarous: Wrong. Welcome to your ULTIMATE DOOM, PUNK! ("Punk" echoes.) *The bedrock arena explodes and everyone besides Bilarous falls in* *The player lands in a Hellish area much like BlackNether, but even more hellish than the latter and the Harskomare fused with each other* Player: Ugh.... where is this place..? BIlarous: I call it The ! A place even worse than.. Uh, what's the worst place you've been? Player: I can tell that it's not THAT bad. Bilarous: Oh, it does! And there's no way in or out, either other than ME! This is also where all my armies reside! DUN DUN DUNNNNN! Player: So what, that doesn't make you instantly unkillable! *the twelth phase begins* Bilarous can now shoot Fireballs from his hand which give you Wither 3, set you on fire, and gvie you fire weakness 6. And he will also summon Pig-Trons, Iron Slugs, Mini Ender dragons, Voidsky Zombies, Voidsky Spiders, Withers, and most commonly, Hostile Corrupt Hybel riders with Emerald swords, and hostile Spacel riders with emerald armor and iron swords at the same time. Bilarous can also give you Scourge 2 for 18 seconds when stared at for 1 second. The next cutscene will play when Bilarous' fourth form has no health left. *The hyrebel falls into Voidic Nether, and lands next to the player, along with the same Hyrebel rider that was thrown off, with the Former rider still being unconscious* Bilarous: Bah, I don't have the time for this. Meet me in my fortress after you get past my defenses. Until then, have fun rotting to death down here! *Bilarous disappears, and the battle ends* Even after beating Bilarous this time, you cannot exit Voidic Nether until Bilarous is defeated for a third time, even when you die and respawn. However, you will get an obedient Hyrebel that you can ride and the Hyrebel can attack other mobs at the same time when close enough. Also, you will not lose your entIre inventory when you die. The hyrebel has Infinite health, but will be stunned for 5 seconds and regenerate Half Health after the five seconds. Tactics (3rd battle) This battle will unlock when the Magma Overlord is defeated. Going on Horseback is the best way to go into the courtyard of the fortress. This cutscene will play when you enter the fortress. *The gates of the fortress close behind the player* *Bilarous appears in his baconic form, sitting on a throne that's slowly spinning and lowering to the floor* Bilarous: You've finally arrived. Took you long enough. Aren't you a persistent punk? The Magma Overlord used to be the ruler of this place, until I took over. Now, my nerdiness is law, and Moe was- Player: Could you try NOT to monologue? Bilarous: I'll speak however I want to, boy! Player: Then I hope you like to die. *Bilarous starts shape-shifting into a corrupted magma cube* Bilarous' Magmonic form has 9000 health, and can shoot fireballs which give fire weakness 8, Fly, and set you on fire and give you poison 7, both if you touch him. The next cutscene will play when you kill Bilarous' Magmonic form. *Bilarous shapeshifts back into a silverfish* Player: You're all out of forms, PUNK. Bilarous: I haven't run out yet! *Bilarous transforms into a Giant abomination that can dwarf the magma overlord in size* Bilarous (Main head): You have no Idea what you're up against. Bilarous: (Upper right head): I think the punk does. Bilarous (Lower right head): He might not. *Arms grow out of the skull's mouths except the main head, and the battle begins* Bilarous' final form has 567000000 health in total. When he swings at you with his red sword with a purple eye he'll do 300 damage on contact. With his black-and-red sword with a yellow eye, He'll do 125 damage and give you wither 4. When you shoot at him, He'll summon a sheild into his two both empty hands and block it. His weak spot is his head. However, you cannot reach it with a sword of any kind, and you don't have the Armageddon Blade at this time. You must survive for 3 minutes. The next cutscene will play when you survive for 3 minutes. *Bilarous grabs the player with his right hand, capturing him/her, and a heartbeat loop plays* Bilarous (Main head): If you were more of a nerd, you would have killed me. But look at yourself now, punk. I've seized you and can kill you at any moment. What can you do? Nothing. You're a speck of dust. But I want to torture you. So you will be my eternal prisoner. And don't even think of breaking out of the prison this time, because I've advanced it to the point that I can't even navigate it without teleporters. Even I could get lost in there. Did I mention I am one can short of a six-pack? *A hyrebel bursts in through the window and hits Bilarous is the head, causing Bilarous to release the player and the player lands on the hyrebel's back. Bilarous (Main head): Ow! You're still a fool! *The second phase begins* The player will start on the back of the same hyrebel they fought on in the second battle, and now you can reach Bilarous' head and attack it. However, Now bilarous can breath a volley of purple shots that give Oblivion 6 and set you on fire. He can also grab you and throw you to the ground, disabling your hyrebel for 7 seconds. He can also shoot cyan shots from his hand at your position which deal 90 damage if you touch them. However, Bilarous will not guard when he is firing these, so you can hit him from afar. If he hits you five times in a row, he will say either "Hahahaha! I AM ONE CAN SHORT OF A SIX-PACK!" or "@#$^ YES, whoa!" The next cutscene will play when you get Bilarous down to 566996000 health. Bilarous (Main head): No matter what you do, You'll never take my nerdiness away. I'm always going to be one can short of a six-pack. *The third phase begins Bilarous can now jump 7 blocks toward you when you are far enough away from him, so he can hit you with his swords. When he lands, he will create shockwaves which deal 30 damage upon touching. He can also summon hostile riders on either all the normal Hybel evolutions, Krieg Horses, Corrupted Horses with maxed out stats, emerald corrupted horse armor, Yvescas, and Golden Vytls. The mounts that cannot fly will try to jump over the shockwaves. He can also now summon Ice Spikes which do 150 damage and give you Slowness 4 for 15 seconds. Bilarous can now say "The Lights!" when he receives blindness. The next cutscene will play when you get Bilarous down to 566990000 health. Bilarous: Okay, time to make this more interesting. *Bilarous summons four hostile Pyrohydra Electa riders with Galactic Superbows, Venomblades, and Emerald armor and disappears, and the fourth phase begins* You must kill the four Pyrohydra Electa riders to proceed. The next cutscene will play when all the Pyrohydra Electa riders are defeated. *Bilarous reappears* Bilarous (Main head): Excellent. Now that you are weakened, I can DESTROY YOU! HAVE AT YOU, PUNK! *The fifth phase begins* Bilarous can now summon Voidsky Spiders and Voidsky Skeletons. He can also shoot a swarm of wither skulls, more quickly than any other projectile attack he uses. He will also transform into a tornado and attempt to ram into you, which does 10 damage every 0.5 seconds ignoring armor for 6 seconds, allowing for a total of 120 damage that ignores armor, if you get caught in it. After the attack is successful, the player will get nausea for 8 seconds. The next cutscene will play when you get Bilarous down to 500000000 health. Bilarous (Top-right head, muffled): Can I stop extending my arm now? Pretty please with a cherry on top? Bilarous (Main head) No way, I HATE cherries! Also, the punk needs to die! *The Sixth phase begins* Bilarous can now attempt to inhale you. You can resist the inhalation, but if he successfully inhales you, you will take a total of 64 damage, then he will spit you out and you will take 50 more damage. He can also summon columns of flame which set you on fire and give you fire weakness 10. The next cutscene will play when you get Bilarous down to 314 health. Bialrous (Main head) That does it, no more weapons for you! *Lightning strikes the player, and he/she loses all of his/her weapons and splash potions* *The seventh phase begins* The player must now fight off Bilarous without any weapons. The final cutscene will play when Bilarous loses all of his health. *Bilarous' heads all shriek in pain and the arms retract, and a heartbeat loop plays* Bilarous (Upper left head): This can't be happening! This isn't happening! How are we dying to this punk!? Bilarous (Lower right head): I told you he knew what he was going up against! Bilarous (Lower left head): Well, at least we tried. Bilarous (Upper Right head): Like I care. Bilarous (Main head) You idiots are just annoying! Anyway, I hope you die.... Bilarous (All heads) PUNK!! '''(Echoing) *Bilarous Dies, and the heartbeat loop stops* Upon Bilarous' death, a Pyrohydra Electa that is tamed to you will spawn. You will also be able to exit Voidic nether now. You will also earn the achievement "Bilarous Blaster". 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